• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Sermo Humilis

Humble Speech

  • Home
  • Topics
    • Just a Thought
    • Who we Are Instead
    • Life in Christendom
  • Series
    • Words that Matter
    • Rock of Ages
    • Let the Lady Speak
    • Life and Times of Jesus
    • Jesus Through all of Life
    • 8 Weeks Before Marriage
    • The Ten Commandments
  • About
  • Contact
  • Subscribe
  • Show Search
Hide Search
You are here: Home / 8 Weeks Before Marriage / 3 Weeks before Marriage – Her House, His Fishing Gear

3 Weeks before Marriage – Her House, His Fishing Gear

April 9, 2019 By David Trounce Leave a Comment

Reading Time: 3 minutes
Print Friendly, PDF & Email

3 Weeks before Marriage - House and Fishing Gear - Sermo Humilis

It’s an easy mistake for a husband to make. He reads in the bible that he is the head of the wife and then begins to fill this language with ideas from elsewhere: From his stint in the Army, the shift manager at work, or from leadership tips picked up at the pub.

In short, such a husband thinks that headship means boss, end of discussion, where’s my supper, or my sex, as the case may be.

Marriage Celtic KnotBut the marriage we see in scripture is more along the lines of a beautiful Celtic knot with each party having true authority in the realm assigned to them by God.

Those who have a responsibility in one area have an obligation to fulfill that responsibility. And those at the receiving end have a right to ask for it.

This is why any husband who thinks that his authority places him above the questioning of his wife is wrong. She has every right to ask him to fulfil his responsibilities and he has every right to ask her to do the same.

This is also why husbands who believe that their wives have no court of appeal outside the marriage are wrong (Consider Abigail in 1 Samuel 25:24-25).

Delegation

The issue is who gets to delegate the responsibilities.

A husband has an obligation to fulfil all of those things which God requires of him as a husband. The same holds true for wives. Both are bound by scripture.

The husband may delegate responsibilities to his wife, but he does so according to an already established scriptural constitution of the home. In other words, he must delegate to her what the Scripture requires of her. He may not delegate to her a responsibility which scripture assigned to him.

For example, a husband may delegate the responsibility for managing the home to his wife. But he does not have permission from God to abdicate his responsibility in times of war by sending her off instead.

The apostle Paul taught this principle clearly.

I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully. (1 Timothy 5:14)

The phrase “guide the house” is a translation of one Greek word which literally rendered would be house-despot. The wife is the mistress of the domain; this is assigned to her by God.

The husband can (and must) delegate this complex web of responsibilities to her. He has no right to withhold such a delegation.

Paul says something similar elsewhere.

That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. (Titus 2:45)

“Keepers at home” renders one word which would literally be house-guard.

Obedience and Honour

Your wife has real and legitimate authority over her own household and no one, husbands included, can take that away from her.

A wife must be obedient to her husband, as this verse states. But the length and breadth of the requests he makes of his wife are determined by scripture, not his whim.

In a certain sense, a husband (as the head of his wife) is an honoured and welcomed guest, and he should learn to see himself as a guest.

He wipes his feet at the door, he eats what is served to him, he aims to conform to the pattern established by her. She, in turn, seeks to honour him.

He leads by endorsing the standards for each of them as laid down by God, not the standards laid down by the current tofu-eating hipster crowd.

He has authority, where Scripture gives it. She has authority where Scripture gives it.

As in all things, Christ is the Lord. Not only of heaven and earth but of every micro-realm too.

As Lord, He has assigned these realms of authority to each. Relating these authorities to one another is a complicated dance requiring grace, humility, and love from all the dancers.

This means that in certain areas in the life of the home a godly husband is active and engaged. In others, he is to delegate and get out of the way.

A wife has authority regarding her husband’s sex life (1 Corinthians. 7:4). She has authority regarding his food (Proverbs. 31:14). She is also responsible for his clothing (Proverbs. 31:21).

But she should probably stay out of his fishing gear.

Related...

6 Weeks before Marriage - Thy Husbands' Racket
2 Weeks before Marriage - Please Remain Calm
#4 Jesus and Marriage
The 7th Commandment

Marriage Preparation PDF

Marriage exists because Christ died for the world. He came to kill the dragon and get the girl. Which He did.

Download the full 8-part Marriage Preparation PDF for free!

Preparing for marriage pdf

Filed Under: 8 Weeks Before Marriage Tagged With: Authority, Home, Marriage


Writing Ideas on Sermo HumilisWhat do You Want to Read About?

 

Nothing like real-world issues to focus the mind. If you have something you would like me to write about, send me a message and let me know.

 

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

Sermo Humilis

For the love of all things true, beautiful and good.


Welcome to Sermo Humilis, a digital home for biblical discipleship and cultural Christianity. A few new thoughts every week.

Please remember to like, subscribe and share. It really helps me out.

Subscribe for Weekly Updates

As per our Privacy Policy, we will never hand your information to a third party.

please check your inbox or spam folder to confirm your subscription.

Categories

  • Life in Christendom
  • Just a Thought
  • Who we Are Instead

Find us on Social

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Medium
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Support Sermo Humilis

If you enjoy Sermo Humilis and want to say thanks you can support me here.

Support

Series

Sidebar - Words that Matter Sidebar Series - Proverbs - Let the Lady Speak Sidebar - Jesus Through all of Life Series

The Most Popular Guff

Gravity and the Grand Design

Everybody has a god, it's inescapable. Whether it's yourself, an

Faith, Working Through Love

There's something about the memory of new love that stays with you

Jesus, Light of the World

In Matthew 12 we learn that the Pharisees and those responsible for

#16 A Sad Story – OT Survey

After the Devastation of the ark, the Tabernacle, and the priesthood

Jesus, Comfort and Joy

In the last few chapters of John, the disciples have become

The 9th Commandment

The ninth commandment, "You shall not bear false witness", is a call

Jesus, When We Die

In Luke 16:19-31, we meet two men. The rich man in this event was an

See and Hear

On the move? Weekly content can also be seen and heard via Youtube.

Topics

Beauty Charity Children Covenant Creation Death Discipleship Evangelism Faith Faithfulness Fear Fellowship Gospel Grace Grief Guilt Holiness Idolatry Image Jesus Joy Judgement Kingdom Law Liberty Life Love Marriage Mercy Money Prosperity Redemption Rest Resurrection Righteousness Sabbath Sacrifice Salvation Sin Truth Victory War Wisdom Work Worship

Footer

  • Home
  • About
  • Contact
  • Privacy Policy
  • Subscribe to Sermo Humilis

Find us on Social

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Support Sermo Humilis

If you enjoy Sermo Humilis and want to say thanks you can support me here.

Support

Copyright © 2022 · Sermo Humilis

Thor's Oak

Around 723 AD, a missionary named Boniface entered Hesse in Germany. Upon finding a sacred tree named Thor’s Oak, he took an axe to it, cut it down and built a church. Many in the town, believing that the God of Boniface must be greater than Thor, left their paganism behind converted to Christianity.

Marriage Preparation
Subscribe and Download the 8 Week Marriage Preparation Series eBook. Free!
As per our Privacy Policy, we will never hand your information to a third party.

<p style="text-align: center;">Thanks for subscribing.</p> <p style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://drive.google.com/file/d/1P1r_cT_AcaXLVDvJ_iB9iR8_muQHuRIK/view?usp=drivesdk" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Click here</a> to open and download your free eBook.</p> <p style="text-align: center;">Please check your inbox or spam folder to confirm your subscription.</p>